In Ephesians 5:23, it says
For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.
It does not say the husband should try to be the head of the wife. It says the husband is the head of the wife.
You don’t have a choice. You are the head of your wife. You are the leader of your family.
You can be a good head. Or you can be a bad head.
Those are your only options.
You don’t get to choose not to be the head of your wife. Such abdication simply means you are a bad head. You cannot wash your hands of this responsibility.
This is what you signed up for. You took on the role of husband and all that the word is invested with.
To be a good husband means to be a good manager of the household. The man of the house. The master of the house.
Other meanings pull from its farming roots. A tiller of the soil.
You are a gardener, meant to till the soil and help it bear much fruit. The main fruit your household should bear is children. Much like the first husband on the face of the earth, Adam, who was told to go forth and multiply. To go forth, and conquer.
You are given the same task.
You are responsible for everything that comes out of your household. After all, it bears your name. No excuses. God has given you real authority and great responsibility.
You are the head of your wife.
Be a good one.