Categories
Masculinity

The Selfishness of Showing Emotion

The attacks on “toxic masculinity” often revolve around the assumption that it is unhealthy to not vent your spleen whenever you feel like it. “Not showing emotion is weak, actually.” Real men cry. In public. And then they post on social media about how they cried in public. But this is foolishness. Masculine men do […]

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Masculinity

When Masculinity is not Masculinity

There is a way to pursue masculinity that is the opposite of masculinity. Sometimes, men will want to start working toward projecting a masculine frame, to communicate better that they are a man. This is a good thing. Whether it is becoming stronger and fit, learning a martial art, or going hunting, we should celebrate […]

Categories
Masculinity

Do a Thirty-Day Challenge

If you want to hack your discipline and improve your productivity, make it a regular habit to do a thirty-day challenge. Discipline is a muscle and laziness is a drug. A good, time-boxed challenge works as both an exercise for your discipline and detox for your laziness. It doesn’t matter what type of challenge you […]

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Masculinity

You Do Not Define Your Identity

Our identities depend on our relationships with other people. We are not autonomous individuals, contra the founding premise of most libertarianism. From the moment we come out of the womb, we have obligations toward our parents. We don’t choose our name. We didn’t even choose to be born. We are not autonomous. We do not […]

Categories
Masculinity

For Men Only

My youngest son, 4 years old at the time, decided to hang out with me while I cut some wood in our garage. He would stand back and cover his ears each time I triggered the miter saw and made a cut. My wife came out to ask a few questions about something, then started […]

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Masculinity

Masculine Markers and the Language of a Culture

Every culture has masculine markers. These are part of the language of the culture that people use to communicate. Men do certain things, dress a certain way, to communicate and signal their masculinity. These markers are not the essence of what it means to be masculine, just a way for someone to communicate that they […]

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Education Masculinity

Rites of Passage for Your Sons

What does it mean to be a man? When does a boy know that he has become a man? These are important questions that our modern culture fails to answer. Even inside the church, answers are sparse. We have done a terrible job directing boys toward manhood. Is it any wonder that they wander? Is […]

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Masculinity

Let Older Men Be Useful

One summer, I worked as the lone car cleaner for an Avis rental franchise. This one was nestled in the back of a BP gas station and never had more than 15 vehicles at one time. Despite the heat and humidity of Kentucky summers, I found the job pleasant enough. Most cars needed only a […]

Categories
Masculinity

Friendship and Physical Affection are Dying

My son, seven years old, had not seen his friend in weeks. After church services ended, his friend was beside our pew faster than I thought possible and they both embraced in one of the most sincere hugs I have ever seen. They yelled each other’s names. They jumped up and down. Then they ran […]

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Masculinity

The Sabotage of Samson

Samson was one of the first superheroes. Possessed of both wit and strength, he confounded his enemies with riddles and performed super-human feats of violence. He killed a lion with his bare hands. He killed thirty men at one time all by himself. He caught 300 foxes, tied them in pairs by their tails, fastening […]